Moses
If you get it then you most admit it here. Honor code.
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booze
I'm getting a liquor delivery in maybe an hour. Aside from that I haven't been outside in 10-odd days. 
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Esoteric Allusion
My partner works in what will be Madison's ground zero response to corona virus. I am 100% getting it. I am gradually recovering from a horrific case of the flu and am hoping that this doesn't make me more vulnerable. 
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booze
My partner works in what will be Madison's ground zero response to corona virus. I am 100% getting it. I am gradually recovering from a horrific case of the flu and am hoping that this doesn't make me more vulnerable. 


For fucking fuck sake, can I just order you some expired Chinese food?
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Zuben
My city just got our first confirmed case today, so I'm now in play!
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Moses
Zuben wrote:
My city just got our first confirmed case today, so I'm now in play!


Did I use "whom" correctly? I know that I did, but I just want Infinitus to shut the fuck up if he tries to challenge it.
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EJ
A parent at one of my secretary's daughter's school has got it.

The Crown is mine, bitches.
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EJ
Oh,  yeah. Those Corona-exposed idiots in St. Louis who cavalierly attended that school dance? That school was my brother's sister-in-law's daughter's school.  Impressed?
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Moses
EJ wrote:
A parent at one of my secretary's daughter's school has got it.

The Crown is mine, bitches.


Even though there won't be an Olympics, this thread will still have a medals stand. 2nd and 3rd places will be acknowledged. 
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EJ
I guess I could have said "my brother's niece's school," but my disease-ravaged brain makes it hartdfyfffgf hrfflnyeeds
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Paquito
I'm in the Boston area, take public transpo to work, and almost exclusively eat out. I'm in the running
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Infinitus Corsair
Moses wrote:


Did I use "whom" correctly? I know that I did, but I just want Infinitus to shut the fuck up if he tries to challenge it.


Are you drunk?
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Infinitus Corsair
I also will get it. Probably at the gym tonight.
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Putu
Moses wrote:


Did I use "whom" correctly? I know that I did, but I just want Infinitus to shut the fuck up if he tries to challenge it.


Whom doom youm think youm arm, Moses? Whom!?
That's...not what I meant at all.
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Moses


Are you drunk?


Sir, if I was drunk, then I would have made a good thread.
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Moses
Putu wrote:


Whom doom youm think youm arm, Moses? Whom!?


Get out of my thread.
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EJ
Did wirthling delete my "crazy Chinaman" post?


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EJ
Oh, and it should be "Who will be the first Kateland poster to get coronavirus?" The question is a subject question, because the answer, contrary to most answers, is actually the subject of the question and not the object.

Compare the question to one like "Where did you eat?" The answer to that would be something like ate at Denny's. (Such questions, at least when the principal verb is an action verb, require auxiliary verbs. Subject questions do not. ) However, the answer to your question is simply something like "Wirthling, that prick  (will get coronavirus first)" i.e., the subject.

Had you configured your question so that the answer was "The coronavirus will infect Wirthling first," then the question would be "Whom will the coronavirus infect first?"
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Esoteric Allusion
My partner's hospital rooms, the ones her patients go to, may or may not be set aside as the special wing for the first influx of corona patients. I wouldn't be allowed to know that, so I have no way of knowing such things. I'm contemplating whether if it's better for me to get it now when hospitals aren't full yet just in case or if I should live like Howard Hughes for a season or two.
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Wreck
I went to Vegas last week and currently have the flu.
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wirthling
Well Tom Hanks has it, so in a way don't we all have it now?
"I am very poorly today and very stupid and hate everybody and everything." - Charles Darwin
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Ray McKigney
wirthling wrote:
Well Tom Hanks has it, so in a way don't we all have it now?
Fuck.
He’s a national treasure.
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JB3
Wreck wrote:
I went to Vegas last week and currently have the flu.


I live in Vegas, so I'm in the running.
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whic
Don't worry about me guys, I'm sure I'll be fine here in "America's Wuhan."
nothing.
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Caesar
It's Bike Week AND Spring Breakers have started to arrive. I won't be spending any time around either group, but I'm probably going to be catching something.

But...my Facebook feed keeps telling me that Black people might be immune to coronavirus because of melanin.

So it looks like I won't be contracting COVID-19.
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Putu
We should probably harvest Caesar’s melanin and distribute it amongst ourselves.
That's...not what I meant at all.
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Detrimental
I'm pretty sure Rudy Gobert is black.
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booze
I don't think Moses has used "whom" correctly since maybe December 2004.
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booze
Detrimental wrote:
I'm pretty sure Rudy Gobert is black.


Yeah, but he's, Frenchy black or something.
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Dyne
I guess I am in the running, considering I am in the country with the second highest rate of infection.  Put my name down.
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EJ
Hey guys, me first: I'm  a crazy Chinaman who smuggles wombats and snuggles tomcats, and eats ocelots, and eats out a lot, and is crazy and dirty and lives in China.
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MadMan
I work in a grocery store so odds are I'll end up getting it from some nasty ass customer who doesn't wash their hands. 
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Rooby
EJ wrote:
Hey guys, me first: I'm  a crazy Chinaman who smuggles wombats and snuggles tomcats, and eats ocelots, and eats out a lot, and is crazy and dirty and lives in China.
::snaps fingers rhythmically::
Torrible. Absotively, posilutely herrible.
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Esoteric Allusion
Based on reading descriptions from people with Corona on what it is like, it fits what I experienced to a t. I absolutely do not want to experience that again. It was miserable. I don’t even feel fully recovered now. My partner thinks I had Corona - she is a nurse - but I have been skeptical because no one around me subsequently got ill and I didn’t think it had spread enough in this area at the time. Now, I am less sure. I will get tested when that becomes available to me.
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Dyne
Quick, everyone start licking hand rails and door knobs at restaurants! EA might actually have had it, and thus claim - what I assume - the cash prize Moses is offering!
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Moses
I am trying really hard to be attracted to Rep. Katie Porter.
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kgaard
Is one of you Mikel Arteta?
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Sprague Dawley
the expert dude on Rogan:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=E3URhJx0NSw

my takeaways:
  • hand washing and masks are largely cosmetic and really only serve to assauge our panic
  • the fucken thing is in the fucken air
  • it's not an oldies thing.
  • it's goign to carve up merkas fatty bastard population like Rieko Ioane carving up the Lions backline
  • once China releases their poor lockdown pricks theyre all gonna get sick anyway.
  • jury's out on closing schools
  • 6 months+ from now its gonna taper off when everyone who was gonna get sick has gotten sick, to whatever degree, and MAY have developed some immunity so they dont get it again (cant recall this exact part)
  • exercise is a great thing. you fat fucks should be forming an orderly queue to take it in turns bench pressing my cock and balls

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Putu
Rogan’s a bogan!
That's...not what I meant at all.
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Sprague Dawley
Thought about doing a Celebrity Death Watch Thread but any celeb with half a brain will have shut it down for 2020 and gone off grid to their mega bunker to drink the wine cellar dry and try to refrain from murdering their whinging shitheaded "loved ones".
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Dyne
I have a co-worker who tested positive. Admittedly, they were and will continue to remain in Denmark, and in no way could have infected the rest of us. But still...sucks.
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Rooby
I developed a wet cough and excessive mucous production in my nose a couple weeks ago, and I at first assumed it was due to prolonged exposure to one of the environmental hazards at my place of employment. However, I quit the job 1 week ago, and my symptoms appear to have gotten worse -- my snot is almost opaque and a pale greenish-yellow hue; same goes for the phlegm in my lungs.

At this point, I am more than 50% certain it's due to an allergy since the climate has warmed up some lately. And the symptoms I read about in articles concerning the coronavirus only partially overlap with what I'm experiencing. I don't have any kind of fever. I need to read up some more on it and see if I can find out how long it takes for all of the viral symptoms to develop in a person. Or at least get a rough idea.

If I am the first among us to catch the virus, I hope there's a prize lined up.
Torrible. Absotively, posilutely herrible.
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Paquito
the expert dude on Rogan:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=E3URhJx0NSw

my takeaways:
  • hand washing and masks are largely cosmetic and really only serve to assauge our panic
  • the fucken thing is in the fucken air
  • it's not an oldies thing.
  • it's goign to carve up merkas fatty bastard population like Rieko Ioane carving up the Lions backline
  • once China releases their poor lockdown pricks theyre all gonna get sick anyway.
  • jury's out on closing schools
  • 6 months+ from now its gonna taper off when everyone who was gonna get sick has gotten sick, to whatever degree, and MAY have developed some immunity so they dont get it again (cant recall this exact part)
  • exercise is a great thing. you fat fucks should be forming an orderly queue to take it in turns bench pressing my cock and balls



Also, most kids are asymptomatic carriers. Trump may put them in cages
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wirthling
Theory: This coronavirus was engineered by DoorDash.
"I am very poorly today and very stupid and hate everybody and everything." - Charles Darwin
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EJ
Lotta white trash babies named Korona going to be born nine months from now.
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Putu
EJ wrote:
Lotta white trash babies named Korona going to be born nine months from now.


Ooh, you make my fever run,
Pneumonia,
Coughin’ up half a lung,
My Korona!  
That's...not what I meant at all.
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Digital Geist

I directly work with people in emergency situations and in a critical care setting. This also frequently involves aerosol generating procedures and managing mechanically ventilated patients. Of course, this is also in Portland, in an area with a hilarious amount of the at-risk population. 

Finally, I feel like I can finally win something! 




...

fuck. 

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Esoteric Allusion
Well, it's looking pretty likely coronavirus is in my household now. Fever and hacking dry cough just appeared. Either I'm the original carrier or it's coming in now. Both seem technically possible. If I didn't have corona before, which I still think is quite likely, I am genuinely concerned about how bad it will get for me. I am not recovered from my previous flu. And, of course, I have a loved one who is probably going to have to play Corona roulette now.
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Esoteric Allusion
I'd just like to say, motherfucking fuck.
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Putu
Shit, EA. How long ago were you ill? 
That's...not what I meant at all.
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